The Refiner's Fire

Well it seems that this summer has been the summer of the refiners fire for a lot of people I know. I wonder what it is that we all need to learn or is it that we just are not as dependent upon the Lord as we should be. That is a rhetorical question, of course. We each have our trials to go through and face, I just wonder why it seems that people that I really care about are being faced with such serious trials. Is it because I am getting older and the trials are bigger? Is it because life just comes at you faster?

I look back on the past 20 years and I am amazed at the things that I have learned both by force and by choice. There are lessons that I never would have chosen to learn. There are things that have taught me just how much the Lord wants us to take care of each other in these times of trials. I know that I am better at doing the taking care of and not being the one being taken care of, but I am trying to get better at that. This week has taught me a lot. I have humbled myself and called and asked for help. It has been hard, but I am so very grateful to my friends who have come by and helped with laundry and Kenna. I am grateful for these friends who have listened to me this week as I have worked through these crazy emotions and hormones! :)

I thought I was prepared for this journey, but I have realized that I wasn't. There are emotions and feelings that hit me when I least expect them not to mention the annoying incisions that are still bugging me. I wonder when we were up in heaven and we looked at this life and the trials we would face if we fully realized the pain we would face? Would we know that we would have friends to help us through? Would we know that we would have the Savior to help us let go of the pain, the anger, the loneliness, the bitterness, and the sorrow? But that we might not always turn to Him? We might in our pride rely on ourselves?
I am grateful that I have the gospel in my life. It gives me the knowledge that I have a Savior. For so long I did not know that. I am so glad that I know that I have a loving Father in Heaven who provided a Savior for me who knows how I feel. I may not always comprehend His love, but I feel it and I see it in the world around me.
Optimism is a gift that He gave me and I am grateful for it. There have been times in my life when I felt I would lose it, but I know that He carried me to that eleventh hour so that I would not lose it. So to my friends who are in that fire right now-hold on. Don't give up. I may not be able to drive for another week, but I am always here for you. :)