Four years

Four years ago today I had a miscarriage at 13 weeks. I always believed in having a spirit before we came to earth-it was one of the principles that drew me to the church. I had a connection to this baby that I had not had with the others. Even as I began to bleed like the other pregnancies on Easter I just figured it would be a long pregnancy. When I got the news on the 17th that there was no heartbeat, I prayed for a miracle. But by the middle of the night on the 18th I knew that was not to be the case. I can not deny the Lord's hand in those four days. I had a blessing from Jeremy that carried me through the night until we made it to the doctor. And I felt his little spirit with me all that time. It wasn't until I woke up after the procedure that it was so profound. I knew he was with me before the D&C and gone afterwards. So I have that testimony of we lived before we came here. I can only hope that even if I never got the chance to hold him in my arms and get to know him as others have with the children they have known and loved and lost-I hope that I will get that chance one day. One of my mission friends posted pictures of her 20 week baby's hands and feet impressions that was lost last year and it was amazing to be reminded just how fragile life is and to appreciate every moment that we have....