Being a Mom

I've decided that there is no harder job than that of a parent. It never ends and it never gets an easier. I know that even when your kids are grown you will still be a parent. I look at the little girls and think right now it is so easy to solve their problems or fix what they don't like. Cheer them up is a tickle session or a trip to the park or ice cream from Culver's. Calming their fears you can hug them or say a prayer or just hold them.
Then time goes on- they are scared of not having friends or not getting good grades, etc. You try to teach them the principles they need to be grounded. You try to be a good parent and yet still be a friend so they will talk to you. You want to fight their battles and make sure that they are treated fairly and find success. It is hard to realize when to back off and let them fly. It is hard to realize they are growing up so fast. It is hard to not let your experiences as a kid cloud your judgement of how to help your kids or send them in a direction that you think is better.
I have been reading the Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites books to the kids before bed every night and it has made me think a lot about my parenting. In the book I am reading to them right now-they go back in time when the Savior appears in the Americas. It has made me stop and think about what I want most for my family if I like Renae in the book was taken from her family and it was just Dad and the kids.
Then as I was talking to Kelsey about soccer -she wants to try another sport because soccer is not fun anymore-I wondered-was it something I did wrong? Is it my fault that she does not want to play? She has an amazing talent as a soccer player. But she seems excited to swim on the swim team this summer-so maybe she will find the fun she once had in soccer there. I have struggled to make the right decision-should we switch clubs? so we play up? should we take a break from soccer? I have prayed and asked for guidance. I missed all the clues that she was trying to give. So I guess I am having a bad mom moment. I missed the inspiration I was getting in my hopes and dreams for her.
Someone once told me when Kyle was in kindergarten-you want that teacher to love your child as much as you do. After all they spend more waking time with them then you do. I think I felt the same way about Kelsey and soccer. I just wanted someone to love Kelsey as much as her old coach in CS did. He was a grandpa and he did such a great job with her. She loved soccer and loved playing for him. He always encouraged her and when we played in College Station in the fall of 2007-he even came to watch her play. I think all this time and all the issues I had-I just wanted someone to take an interest in her like Ray did. He was amazing. So I thank those good people from church callings to school teachers to coaches who have been a good influence in my kids lives. The ones that build them up and really care. It is not about winning or losing in the end-it is about being a team and realizing that each child matters. Each child is a child of God and we are here to help them find joy in this life. I hope that I will take the time to be an instrument for good in the lives of not only my own children but the children that I come across each day.
Being a mom is a blessing and although it is a hard job-it does bring me great joy. I may not be perfect at it-thank goodness for the Atonement-but I do the best I can to guide my children to find lasting peace and happiness in this life and our lives in the next.